


Tea for Three

by freckledandspectacled



Series: Nygmobblepot Week 2k17 [6]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Boys in Skirts, Canon-Typical Violence, First Time, Forced Crossdressing, Gun Violence, Hypnotism, Implied/Referenced Dubious Consent, M/M, Oral Sex, Psychopaths In Love, Rimming, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-20
Updated: 2017-03-20
Packaged: 2018-10-08 06:29:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10380537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freckledandspectacled/pseuds/freckledandspectacled
Summary: Jervis resolves to help Oswald get his Alice, but his methods need some work.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is technically late but my finger is broken, sue me. No beta. And despite the warning, everything that happens in this fic between Oswald and Edward is consensual, apart from a single kiss that could be seen as dubious and is addressed by the characters themselves. Everything else is enthusiastic consent. Happy reading!

The Riddler has just finished cleaning house at an auction, making his getaway with millions in antiques. Leaving his henchpersons to do the actual heavy lifting, he surveys his plunder and grins. Once everything is safety stored they can ditch the getaway vehicles elsewhere and begin the process of selling to their _own_ highest bidders. He heads outside for a smoke, certain that his people can operate for five minutes without him.

“Mr. Riddler,” a man calls. Ed rolls his eyes. He’d overestimated them. Good help is so hard to find. He turns, but instead of a hapless lackey he finds-

“The Mad Hatter… what brings you to my humble abode?” Ed’s alone and unarmed, his weapons and backup too far to make a run for. Should Jervis decide to make a show of force, they’re also too far to offer help in time.

“I have no quarrel with you,” Jervis says, “But I’m not very happy with a friend of yours.”

“What friend?” Ed says, laughing. “Of those, I have none.”

“Surely that isn’t true.” A cheshire cat smile spreads across his face. “Though he hasn’t been handling you like I think he should, he certainly cares for you.”

 _Oswald_. What had he done now? Yet another enemy of his was now at Ed’s doorstep hoping to use him as leverage against the Penguin. This was becoming a regular occurrence.

“Funny, I would have thought shooting him would act as a bit of a deterrent.” Jervis laughs.

“Oh, love is funny that way. You remind me of my dear Alice, she would have said the same about me, you know.” His face darkens. “But it’s no business of mine who turned you against the man who loves you, no, we’re just going to to force his hand. Now come along quietly, Riddler, and I’ll make this easy for you.”

Ed shivers at Jervis’s implication. Oswald might have killed Isabella, but he had never touched Ed. He’d read the reports about what Jervis did to his ‘dear’ sister, and he highly doubted Alice loved him any more than he did Oswald. “I’m not going anywhere with you.”

Jervis pulls a gun.

“On second thought…”

***

Jervis has put Ed in a cozy enough prison. It looks like a child’s room, but there is no window to be found. Ed would have happily picked any lock on the door, but there was no opening on this side either. The Mad Hatter returns about an hour after his initial capture. He’s bearing a piece of cake on a plate, with a small note that says ‘Eat Me’.

Ed has no intention of doing so.

“Oswald should be en route now, and I wouldn’t want him to think I’ve been mistreating you. I’ve brought a little something to hold you over until the party,” Jervis says, putting the cake on the table beside Ed.

“No, thank you,” Ed says mildly, sitting farther back on the bed. Jervis smiles sharply.

“I really must insist,” he says, coming farther into the room. Ed calculates his odds. Jervis appears to be alone, no Tweeds assisting him. Ed is not strong but the door is open and he’s fast. If he can get by Jervis he may be able to get to freedom. It’s a worthwhile risk.

Ed gets to his feet and shoves Jervis as hard as he can, making a break for the door. He slams it shut behind him, hoping that this might trap Jervis inside. Running down the hall, he hears the door open behind him. Crud.

He takes the first turn and finds another door. Testing it, Ed finds it locked. He doubles back, but Jervis is already coming down the hall. Ed’s not great in a fight but he’ll do what he has to. If he can incapacitate Jervis somehow there’s no doubt in his mind he’ll be able to pick his way out of here.

“You’re not behaving very well, Riddler. There will be consequences for this,” Jervis says angrily, advancing on him.

“I’m your prisoner, not your guest. You don’t deserve manners,” Ed says, putting his back to the wall and bracing for a fight. Once he’s close enough, Ed springs forward, aiming punches at his center. He connects with Jervis’s stomach, then feels a sharp pain in his shoulder.

Oh. Jervis has a syringe. Ed had not anticipated that, and now he’s been injected with something. Fantastic.

“You,” he starts, outraged. Then he can no longer seem to stay upright, and the rest of his sentence is lost.

***

“He has nothing to do with this, you vile little man. Whatever this is, it’s between you and me.” Ed groans, lifting his head to find himself at a long table adorned with tea cups and a teapot, and a variety of pastries. Jervis is at one head of the table, Oswald the other, their seating markedly adversarial. Ed has been placed at a seat in the middle.

“That’s where you’re wrong,” Jervis says cryptically.

Ed looks down, blushing furiously and then becoming furious. Jervis has undressed him, leaving him in his white button down but changing his trousers out for a short, pale blue skirt. Apart from the shirt and skirt, he’s bare. His glasses have been taken off, and he has no socks or shoes either.

Jervis claps gleefully. “Look who’s up!”

Oswald’s head snaps to him, “Ed, did he-”

Ed stands, nearly tipping his chair over, “So help me, if you touched me you sick-”

“Ah, ah, ah,” Jervis says, waving his gun around as a warning, “don’t get your _panties_ in a twist.” Something about the way he says it makes Ed’s face drain of color. He sits back down, reaching under the skirt beneath the cover of the table. His fingers don’t meet his briefs, but lace, and he feels bile rising in his throat.

“Oh my god,” Ed gasps, bracing his hands against the table.

“Jervis!” Oswald roars, “If you touched him then there is no deal, there will never _be_ a deal, because I will rip your-”

“Calm down, Penguin,” Jervis soothes. “He wasn’t being very cooperative earlier, and there had to be some punishment for that. Besides, I wanted him to look nice for you. Shame I didn’t have any dresses in his size, I think he’d have looked very pretty, don’t you?”

Oswald is stubbornly silent.

“Very well,” Jervis says, clapping again. It comes to Ed’s attention that while he is unrestrained, Oswald has been tied to his chair. What exactly was Jervis after from Oswald that would warrant this behavior? “This isn’t about a deal, Penguin. This is something much more. I see myself in you.”

Oswald bares his teeth, “You’re nothing like me.”

“Not yet, but that’s what I’m going to help you with. My dear Alice was taken from me, and I’m ashamed to see you’ve hardly even fought for yours.”

Oswald chances a glance at Ed and then answers, “It didn't work out very well for me.”

“I’m not his,” Ed says, “And your sister would have killed you if she had the chance.”

“Shut up!” Jervis screams, pointing the gun at Ed. “She loved me, they turned her against me just as you were turned. Our love was real, as is the love between you, and I’m going to _prove it_.” Jervis removes his pocket watch.

“Jervis, whatever you’re trying to prove, it won’t work. Ed doesn’t love me, he’s made that abundantly clear. Please, stop this. Let him go,” Oswald says, begging for the second time in Ed’s memory.

“He doesn’t love you because you didn’t _make_ him love you, but I’m going to fix that. I’ll show you it’s real, that you’re soulmates, that you belong together,” Jervis says, returning his attention to Ed. “Listen to the watch. Listen to the way it’s ticking. It synchronizes with your heartbeat. Now look into my eyes. Not above them, not around them, but deep into their center. You are completely relaxed.”

Ed says nothing.

“Stand up,” Jervis tells him. Ed stands. 

“No,” Oswald whispers. “Tetch, you absolute madman, this won’t prove anything!”

“It will,” Jervis says, “I’m going to prove that if you take what you want from him it doesn’t matter what anyone else says, it will be real to you. That’s all that matters. Ed, get cozy with him.” Ed begins approaching Oswald’s chair.

“No, it’s not all that matters. It’s about what he wants as well. True love is not one sided, and I decided long ago that his happiness is more important to me than my own. You can’t _make_ him be happy any more than you can _make_ him love me. Now stop this,” Oswald tells him, eyes widening as Ed slowly nears.

“You’re wrong, if they are your true love then they _must_ love you back. Alice was just led astray. But you can fix it, Oswald. I can _help_ you. Ed will be very happy once you do, I promise. We can make him love you, it’s so easy. I’ll show you.” Ed finally ends his slow march to Oswald’s chair, hiking his skirt up and straddling Oswald’s lap. “Eddie, give us a smile.”

A soft smile lights up his face as he looks at Oswald, he turns to gaze at Tetch as well. Oswald wants to weep; it’s been ages since Ed looked at him like that, and it isn’t even _real_.

“Stop it, Jervis,” Oswald begs, “He doesn’t want this, let him go. Please. I am _begging_ you.”

“No!” Jervis shouts, springing from his chair. “He can love you, you’re just too weak to _take_ it from him. You’re meant to be together, Oswald, you’re allowed to because of that, don’t you understand? He’s yours, just as you are his. Of course he wants it, he’s just shy like dear Alice. That’s why men like you and I have to assert ourselves, or there would never be any love at all in this wretched world.”

Oswald shakes his head, there was no reasoning with him. He needs to get them out of here before something regrettable happens. Jervis takes a sip of his tea, presumably to soothe himself after all the shouting and unpleasantness.

“You’re unhappy with me. Fine. We’ll take baby steps. Edward, kiss him.” Ed immediately brings their lips together. Oswald whimpers. This isn’t how it was supposed to happen. Not like this. Never like this. Ed’s mouth is soft, but Oswald refuses to kiss back. He won’t play this game, he won’t hurt Ed.

“Stop,” Jervis says, and Ed pulls back. “You have to kiss him back, Oswald.”

“I won’t,” he spits, growling at Jervis over Ed’s shoulder.

“I can make this worse for him if you don’t,” Jervis threatens, voice low. “Take your shirt off.”

Ed begins unbuttoning his shirt. Oswald feels sick, keeping his gaze on Jervis. _This doesn’t change anything_ , he tells him in his glare.

“Pick up the knife behind you.” Wait, no. “Put the knife to your throat.” Ed complies, the edge of the blade hovering near his adam’s apple.

“Stop! Fine. What do you want me to do?” Oswald asks. He’s caught between a rock and a hard place, he hopes Ed can forgive him for the choices he’s making.

“Put the knife back on the table, there’s a good boy. Now, Oswald, all I want you to do is have fun with him. Enjoy yourself. He’s yours, after all. Remove your underwear.” Ed stands and reaches under the skirt. Oswald watches with dread as a pair of white lace panties slip down his legs and onto the floor. Ed steps out of them.

“Kiss him,” Jervis tells him. Ed hikes the skirt up once more and slides back into his lap, meeting Oswald’s lips again. Oswald parts his lips, letting Ed’s tongue flick over his mouth and doing the bare minimum to keep up the appearance of kissing back. He’s grateful Jervis has tied him to the chair, that he’s not expected to touch Ed. He doesn’t think he could bring himself to.

“Very good, Oswald,” Jervis says, coming around the table. He still has the gun in his hand. “Do you want to fuck him?”

“Of course I do,” Oswald hisses, “But I _won’t_ , not like this.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jervis exclaims.

“It means I won’t do anything to him when he’s like this,” Oswald says, avoiding Ed’s continued kisses in order to speak. He needs to make Jervis understand. “I won’t touch him unless he asks me to. It’s not… it’s not _polite_.”

“Well, why didn’t you just say so? Ed, _politely_ ask Oswald to fuck you.”

Ed ceases his attempts to keep pressing kisses onto Oswald and meets his gaze instead. It appears vacant. “Oswald, please fuck me.”

Tears spill down Oswald’s face. This is wrong, this is so wrong. His chest heaves. Jervis is next to them now. Oswald beings to realize that there is nothing he can say to make Tecth understand, he’s just that _vile_.

“Hypnosis does wonders when you make love. No mental barriers preventing you from loosening up, it’s astonishing. Although lube would not be amiss for the mechanics of it in this instance.”

“I’m not raping him like you raped your precious sister!” Oswald shouts, spit flying from his mouth as he rages at Jervis. He had avoided use of that word for fear of how Jervis would react, but there’s nothing left to do. Oswald is not letting this happen without exhausting every avenue he possibly could have.

“Oh, come now, such foul language. Don’t worry, Oswald, I’ll get him wet for you.” The insult rolls off of him like it’s nothing, and Oswald’s only recourse left is to voice his continued objection to Tetch's actions.

“Don’t you _dare_ ,” Oswald shrieks. Jervis ignores him and pulls a bottle of lube from his suit pocket, putting both it and the gun on the table. He reaches under Ed’s skirt.

Ed whips around, cracking Jervis in the face with his elbow. He twists in Oswald’s lap and grabs the gun off the table, pointing it at Jervis and shooting him in the leg. Jervis falls to the floor, screaming.

“Crud,” Ed says, trying to aim again. He shoots Jervis’s other leg and is slightly disappointed with himself. It’s not like he has his glasses, he reasons, pointedly ignoring the fact that he’s always had terrible aim. “Oh, nevermind.”

“Ed?” Oswald asks, astonished.

“Oh, sorry,” Ed says, standing. He grabs the knife from earlier off the table. The blood drains from Oswald’s face.

“Ed, please, I didn’t want any part of this. You have to believe me, I would never hurt you, I swear on my mother’s grave I would never have touched you.” Ed pauses, tilting his head.

“I know,” he says mildly, cutting Oswald free.

“How did you do that?” Oswald asks, still shocked by Ed’s quick turnaround from docile puppet back to himself.

“Do what?” Ed says, dropping to his knees to cut Oswald’s legs loose. He checks on Jervis, who appears to have passed out from either blood loss, pain, or shock. Excellent.

“Break out of the mind control.” Ed laughs at him.

“I’m not susceptible to hypnosis,” he drawls. “You can only be hypnotized if you’re open to it, and I’m well aware of his tricks. I have a few of my own.”

“You mean you- that was all-” Oswald stutters.

“I was playing along, yes.” The last rope drops and Ed stands. Oswald does as well, seizing him by the arms and pulling him into a hug.

“I’m so glad, when I think of what he might have had me do...” Oswald pauses, suddenly hit by the realization that Ed is currently dressed in a skirt, and _only_ a skirt. They’re not even on friendly terms, last he checked. He lets go, sheepish. “Sorry, I’m sorry. I’m just so happy you’re alright.”

“Oswald,” Ed starts, hesitating and then pulling Oswald back into a hug. “You were every bit the gentleman… you’re a far better man than Tetch when it comes to love. Perhaps I’ve been unfair to you.”

“You don’t owe me anything for loving you,” Oswald declares, that familiar passion returning to his voice, “Don’t let that madman twist this into something it’s not.”

“I’m not, it’s just…” Ed sighs. How could he even begin to explain how Tetch’s twisted views on love highlighted just how wise Oswald had become on the subject. Oswald has made mistakes, but he’s also learned. He’d been meaning to contact Oswald on the very subject, before this whole debacle.

“I’ve missed you,” Ed confesses. It’s more than that, but it will be much simpler to show Oswald, rather than tell him. This situation has presented a wonderful opportunity to do just that. Oswald hugs him tighter in response. “I’m sorry I kissed you without your permission, but I had to play along until Jervis let his guard down.”

“Think nothing of it,” Oswald says, dismissing the notion of wrongdoing. Ed was quite literally under the gun, they’d both done what they had to. He feels Ed nod, holding him closer in return. “Now, what should we do with Tetch? The choice is yours.”

Ed hums, pulling out of the embrace. “I’m not interested in that right now.”

“No?” Oswald says. He sits back down in the chair and opens his phone. “I’m going to call my people, they can hold him for you until you decide.”

“Not just yet,” Ed says. He closes Oswald’s phone and holds his hand in his, leaving the phone on the table behind him.

“We should tie him up,” Oswald suggests.

“He’s not going anywhere,” Ed says. Jervis appears to be out cold, if he’s not dead already. Oswald will concede that point, especially when considering that Ed is still holding his hand. He’d like to prolong that, if possible. Ed suddenly drops into his lap again.

“We should find your clothes,” Oswald squeaks. Ed puts Oswald’s hand on his thigh, sliding his palm up under the hem of the skirt.

“I don’t need them,” Ed whispers, leaning in close to his face.

“Is this a trick?” Oswald asks him.

“It would be easier if it was,” Ed admits, kissing him. Ed’s lips are as soft as before, but this time there’s no sick feeling in the pit of Oswald’s stomach. He leaves his left hand where Ed’s placed it under his skirt, bringing the other to the small of him back to press them together.

“Please don’t do this to me if you don’t mean it,” Oswald says into his mouth, regretfully breaking their lips apart to get the words out.

“No one can make me do anything I don’t want to do,” Ed declares, vehement. “I mean it. Now keep kissing me.” Oswald digs his fingers into Ed’s back and thigh, kissing him as requested. He licks into Ed’s mouth, exploring the ridges on the roof and those big white teeth that lend him impossibly wide grins. Ed sucks on his tongue and digs his nails into Oswald’s shoulder. Oswald lets Ed nip at his lip and tug at his hair, remaining still and trying to let Ed control the pace.

Then Ed rolls his hips down into Oswald, and he decides he’s been patient long enough. Oswald moves both hand under Ed’s thighs, standing and keeping his weight on his good leg for the quick bout of strength necessary to transfer Ed onto the table. Ed latches onto him, legs squeezing tightly around his waist, additionally supporting his weight by wrapping his arms around Oswald’s shoulders. It’s helpful, allowing Oswald to sweep one arm out over the table and clear it of glassware and china before laying Ed back on it. The obstacles go crashing to the floor, shattering and quickly forgotten. He kisses Ed again, pinning him to the table with his weight.

“Is this okay?” Oswald asks, pushing hair back from his face.

“Yes,” Ed says, nodding. “You can have sex with me, I know you want to.” Oswald groans, kissing him again. He trails his fingers to Ed’s ass; the flimsy skirt was useless at this point, already bunched up around Ed’s waist. He certainly wants to, that’s not the issue.

“Do you want me, or are you just using me to prove a point?” Ed searches his face.

“No, Oswald, I-”

“Because I have wanted you for so long, and I’m not doing this to you if it’s to spite Jervis and prove that you can’t be forced into anything you don’t want. You’ve made that abundantly clear-”

Ed silences his tirade with a kiss. “Do you want the truth?”

“That would be helpful, yes.” Ed swallows and ducks his head.

“I do want you. Like that.”

“Like what?” Oswald needs to know.

“Like…” he sighs and pulls Oswald back down on top on him, whispering into his ear. “I want you inside of me.” Oswald shivers, Ed’s breath hot on his ear. Oswald pulls back again, leaving the tempting embrace. He needs this to be crystal clear.

“Because Jervis gave you the idea? How do I know a part of you wasn’t listening to him, or that you’re not still doing what he wanted?” Oswald isn’t going to ruin this because he rushed into things. Especially if this could be the second chance he’s been waiting for with Ed.

“Oswald, you are really killing the mood here. I know what I want,” Ed says, stubborn as always. He sits up, grabbing Oswald’s face and kissing him. Ed crosses his legs behind Oswald, pouring every ounce of passion he possesses into it. If kissing Oswald qualifies as a suitable counter argument in this little debate he’s started over Ed’s sincerity, Ed is playing to win. Oswald kisses back just as forcefully, fingers pushing under the skirt to grab Ed’s ass and bring him to the edge of the table. Ed moans aloud at the touch, clutching Oswald to him while he speaks. “I know because I’ve thought about it before, I’ve wanted you to do this to me before.”

Oswald believes him, the idea sending arousal spiraling through him anew. Oswald ducks down and kisses Ed’s collarbone, pushing him to lie back again. He eyes the lube Jervis left on the table; he’ll check it out later.

“When?” he asks, kissing down Ed’s chest.

“When you killed that man in my apartment. When you visited me in Arkham.” Oswald doesn’t interrupt. Ed was answering his question, after all, and with a surprising lack of riddles no less. He resolves to remain quiet and continue lavishing Ed’s body in affection until Ed has finished, despite the shocking revelation that Ed has been pining after him for far longer than he’s been interested in Ed. “I wanted you after Butch nearly killed me.” Ed laughs. “Both times, actually.”

Ed guides Oswald back into a kiss, holding tightly onto his biceps to keep Oswald close. “That day in _The Sirens_...” He sighs. “It was was _incredibly_ frustrating. I had the ridiculous notion you were going to kiss me on stage, in front of all those people and their cameras.” Oswald kisses him now, as if he’s trying to make up for the slight. Ed’s not finished, though.

“I had the same thought again, later that night. More than anything, I wanted you to take me on that couch, in front of the fire.” Ed runs his hands down to Oswald’s crotch, cupping him through his pants and squeezing. “I wanted to show you I’d do anything for you, and all you wanted to do was hug me.”

“I want more than that, now,” Oswald tells him, kissing down Ed’s chest again. Ed has said enough.

“We can do that, we can do anything you want,” Oswald swears, planting kisses on Ed’s stomach and then flipping the skirt up again. He pushes Ed’s legs back and apart.

“Stop me if you need to,” he says, disappearing between Ed’s legs and licking over him. Ed shouts, bucking under him. His hands come to rest in Oswald’s hair while he continues. He doesn’t push or pull, just anchors his hands on Oswald while he finally pushes his tongue _in_.

Ed’s thighs shake, and he feels heat coiling in his stomach already. He marvels at the new sensations Oswald’s ministrations are causing. Ed tangles his fingers in the soft fluff of Oswald’s hair, his heart rate accelerating. He’s breathless, panting at the feeling of Oswald’s tongue inside of him. It feels so good, he wonders if he’ll even last long enough to get what he really wants.

“Oswald,” he calls, deciding he’s had enough when he can barely restrain himself from forcing Oswald’s head deeper between his cheeks.

“Yes?” Oswald says, peeking up from between his legs and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

Rather than a demand to get on with it, he finds himself saying, “I’ve never done this before.”

“Do you want me to stop?” Oswald asks, standing over him again.

“No, but I think I’d like you to finger me now.” Oswald huffs at Ed’s antics and smiles, then grabs the lube Tetch left behind. It’s labelled, and when he flips the cap he sees it’s still sealed.

Ed kisses him, fingers cupping his face. “Do you know what to do?”

“Yes,” Oswald says, peeling off the seal and capping it before squeezing some of the lube into his hand. He lets it warm on his fingers and kisses Ed again, pressing a finger to his rim and working it in. Ed breaks the kiss, mouth pressing into a line while he concentrates. His brow furrows, and Oswald presses a kiss to it. “Relax.”

“I am,” Ed snaps. 

“You don’t sound very relaxed,” Oswald says, working his finger into Ed with some difficulty. 

“Then distract me,” Ed demands, pulling Oswald’s head down to kiss him. Oswald hums, sucking on Ed’s tongue and then continuing his previous explorations. He feels Ed relaxing around his finger as he does, breaking off to kiss along his jaw and sucks hickies into his throat. Oswald pushes in a second.

Ed tenses immediately, and Oswald is unable to sink his fingers much farther than his first knuckle. Oswald kisses down Ed’s chest, rubbing his thumb over one nipple and licking the other.

“Oh,” Ed breathes, hands returning to Oswald’s hair to keep his mouth latched onto his nipple. Oswald sinks his fingers in, twisting them inside of Ed. He moans, head tilting back, fingers tightening in Oswald’s hair. Oswald moves them again, scissoring slightly to stretch Ed’s rim for more. He continues the gentle motion and moves to give Ed’s other nipple the same attention, dragging his digits in and out of him.

He turns his hand over, crooking his fingers in a come-hither motion. Ed shouts, practically jumping off the table and knocking Oswald’s chin on his chest. Oswald bites his own tongue but stills his fingers inside of Ed, refusing to rip them out in his shock and hurt him.

“ _Oswald_ , do that again- you’re bleeding! I’m so sorry, oh my... here, wait-” Ed stretches, grabbing a napkin off the table and pressing it to Oswald’s lips. “I’m sorry, that just felt so good. I’ll be more careful.”

“It was my fault, I went too fast,” Oswald says, pulling his fingers very gently from the clutch of Ed’s body. This is humiliating. He takes the napkin from Ed, spitting blood into it. “Do you want me to do it again?”

“Yes,” Ed says, laying back against the table. “If you’d like.”

“I’d like,” Oswald tells him, kissing Ed while his fingers find their way back inside of him. Ed keeps a hand on the nape on his neck, sitting up on one elbow to meet Oswald’s mouth while he pushes back in. Ed moans, tasting blood on his tongue and licking his way into Oswald’s mouth, over the cut. Oswald scissors his fingers, starting the process of stretching him over again. Ed breaks off, keeping his forehead pressed to Oswald’s. He pants into Oswald’s mouth, rocking down onto his hand as he presses inside.

The next time Oswald turns the pads of his fingers into Ed’s prostate, he maintains a safe distance. Ed yells again, bucking his hips into Oswald’s and then rocking back down onto his hand to do it again.

“You should give me another,” Ed pants, “I’m ready.” Oswald kisses him, coating each of his fingers again before pressing three in. He’s up to the last knuckle when Ed hisses uncomfortably. Oswald bends, taking Ed’s cock into his other hand and kissing the head of it.

“Oswald,” Ed gasps softly in surprise, reaching one hand to pet Oswald’s hair as he takes the tip of Ed’s cock into his mouth. Oswald works the base with his hand, mouthing over the head. He’s really not focused on pleasuring Ed this way, holding him in his mouth more than anything while he tries to get his fingers deeper. It works, at any rate, allowing him to slip his fingers all the way inside. He pops off of Ed’s cock.

“Feels alright?” he asks. Ed nods, then seems to shake himself out of a reverie.

“It’s a bit of a stretch, but it doesn’t hurt.”

“Good,” Oswald says, at a loss for what else to tell him. He stands upright again, not planning on sucking Ed’s cock any more now that he has three fingers inside of him. He moves them in and out only minimally, focusing his efforts on flexing and spreading them inside of Ed. Oswald’s cock is a fair deal larger than his fingers. He hasn’t done this before, but that seems to be the drawback. In fact, Ed has more sexual experience than he does, and he wonders if he should talk with Ed about it now. Does Ed know how he should be fingering him better than Oswald does?

“What do you want me to do?” Oswald asks him. 

“What?” Ed says, seeming a little dazed. He’s sweating, chest rising and falling quickly. Perhaps Oswald is doing a better job than he thinks. “Oh, just… keep doing that.”

“Ed, I really don’t know what you mean,” Oswald says, continuing to twist and spread his fingers.

“That’s nice but… that other thing you did.” Ed lifts two fingers and crooks them. “That feels _fantastic_.”

Oswald turns his fingers, pressing the pads of all three _up_ -

“ _Yes!_ ” Ed cries euphorically. Oswald pulls his fingers out a bit, pumping them back in at an experimental angle. “ _Oh!_ Oh, _yes_.” He continues the motion, listening to Ed’s gasps and moans each time he presses his fingers inside of him. Ed claws at the tablecloth, writhing. He puts his hand in his mouth, biting at the knuckle.

“Wait, wait, stop,” he gasps. Oswald pauses. “I still want you inside of me, I think I’m ready.” Oswald feels heat pool in his gut, the wait nearly over. Ed sits up on the edge of the table, pulling Oswald closer by the lapels of his suit and kissing him. 

“You’re a little overdressed,” he says, fingers dropping to Oswald’s belt and blindly tugging it loose as he sucks Oswald’s tongue into his mouth. Ed undoes his fly and reaches into his underwear, pulling his cock free. Ed breaks the kiss, looking down at his hand. He smiles, something like hunger in his gaze. Oswald likes being the cause of that look. Ed grabs the lube, squirting a generous amount into his hand and pulling Oswald into another kiss while he strokes his cock.

“Do you think it’ll fit?” Ed whispers playfully between one kiss and the next. Oswald thrusts into his hand, so on edge that the pressure of Ed’s hand is absolute bliss.

“I really hope so,” Oswald says. Ed finally finishes with him, laying back against the table. Oswald holds one of his legs aloft, kissing his calf and knee, planting another a little ways down his thigh as he slips three fingers and more lube back inside. Satisfied, he takes his cock in hand and presses it between his cheeks.

“Relax,” Oswald says, pushing the head inside. Ed is so tight it’s agony not to thrust deeper, but he waits. The pressure around the tip of his cock is incredible, he’d never imagined how the sensation might actually _feel_. Ed takes a deep breath.

“Keep going, I’m okay.” Oswald pushes in a little farther, keeping a hand on Ed’s hip, the other holding his leg up. Ed hisses and he stops, pressing more kisses to his thigh. “I’m okay,” he insists. Oswald strokes Ed’s cock, hand still wet with lubricant, pushing in further as Ed relaxes around him. It’s slow going, but eventually he’s fully seated. Oswald lowers Ed’s leg, putting both hands on his hips and pulling them flush.

“How do you feel?”.

“Full, stretched thin. You feel… really deep.” He presses a hand to his stomach. 

“I feel like I can feel you here.” He takes one of Oswald’s hands, pressing it over his smooth stomach and keeping a hand over Oswald’s. Oswald wants to remember this moment forever.

“You can move a little,” Ed says softly. Oswald rocks gently, feeling as though he’s barely able to do anything, Ed’s so tight.

“This is okay?”

“Yes- _oh_. Yes, it’s okay,” Ed says, squeezing his hand. Oswald turns it over, taking Ed’s hand in his and pressing it back against the table. He links their fingers, still gently rocking into him. Ed cards a hard through his hair and brings his legs around Oswald’s waist. He leverages himself against Oswald with them, starting to rock back into those gentle thrusts.

“You look stunning like this,” Oswald tells him, “and you feel so good. Does it feel good yet?” Ed flushes, and Oswald feels him clench around his cock. That’s new. He jolts, losing his rhythm for a beat and making Ed gasp and clench around him again. Oswald stills before he does it again.

“It feels good,” Ed says, breathless, “You can do that again.”

Oswald thrusts a little harder into him and Ed moans, squeezing his hand and digging his nails into Oswald’s bicep. Oswald moves as smoothly as he can, in and out, watching the pleasured expressions crossing Ed’s face. He makes the sweetest sounds when Oswald pushes inside of him. Oswald bends, kissing over Ed’s chest as works his hips. He licks over his nipples, moves back up to bite at his neck. Oswald sucks kisses all over his throat and licks at the dip in it. He sinks his teeth into tendons and leaves a hickey over his jugular.

Ed keeps squeezing his hand, and claws at the back of Oswald’s suit jacket. He whines at every kiss and makes the most obscene moans when Oswald bites. They start a reciprocal motion as Oswald moves, Ed clenching around him when he does anything particularly pleasurably inside of him, spurring Oswald on to do it again.

“Harder, please,” Ed says. Oswald pulls back, letting go of Ed’s hand in favor of holding both his hips as he complies. Ed sits up, wrapping his arms around Oswald’s shoulders.

“Don’t go so far,” he whispers, kissing him. Oswald moans and drops his hands to Ed’s ass instead, pulling him to the edge of the table to meet his thrusts. Ed threads a hand into his hair, tilting Oswald’s head so as to kiss him better while they surge against one another.

“Damn,” Oswald gasps, feeling his leg starting to give. He’s _not_ stopping, not when Ed’s eyes are fluttering like that and he’s moaning wantonly on Oswald’s cock.

“What, _oh_ , what’s wrong?” Ed asks, immediately tuning in to Oswald’s tone.

“It’s just my leg,” he soothes, thrusting harder to compensate. And to distract. 

“ _Ah_ \- sit down, we should be on a bed, _oh_ , maybe next time- _AH_ \- sit down, Oswald!” Ed demands, not allowing Oswald’s increased vigor to fool him. Oswald puts his hands under Ed’s thighs and waits for him to unlock his legs from around Oswald’s waist.

He doesn’t so much sit as crash backwards onto the chair, forgetting that his pants are currently in a tangle around his legs. Ed lands hard on top of him, moaning as the force of it pushes Oswald into him. He immediately plants his feet and rocks into Oswald’s lap, picking up the pace they had earlier. Oswald is momentarily stunned by the impact but recovers quickly. He kisses Ed, slipping his hands back under the skirt to cup his ass and help Ed bounce on his cock.

“Touch me,” Ed says. Oswald moves his hand under the skirt, finding Ed’s cock and tugging at it. Ed makes a high pitched, breathy whine that has Oswald slamming up into him. “I’m close, oh my.”

Oswald stokes faster, feeling the way Ed’s thighs are shaking around him.

“You look pretty in a skirt,” Oswald tell him, “You’re handsome out of it, but you look so, so pretty in one.”

“I’m not pretty,” Ed tells him, face heating despite himself, “I’m a menace to society.”

“You’re the prettiest menace I’ve ever met,” Oswald says. “You baffle me.”

“That’s part of being a menace, but _ah_ \- I shouldn’t baffle _you_ of all people. _Oh_ , oh dear.” Ed moans, tilting his head back, and Oswald licks a stripe up his neck. “You have everything you need to figure me out.”

Oswald doesn’t feel like that’s true, but he keeps stroking Ed, keeps trying to stave off his orgasm. Ed does not so much kiss him as begin pressing their mouths together, breathless and gasping.

“I’m going to come now,” Ed says between deep but fleeting kisses, his voice high and straining. It’s the sexiest thing Oswald’s ever heard, until Ed moans ‘ _Oswald_ ’ in that same tone and sends him barreling into his own climax. It takes everything he has to keep his hand moving over Ed’s cock while Ed continues rolling his hips into him, panting hot on the side of Oswald’s neck as he comes over his hand. Ed leans in close, hugging him while he shudders apart in Oswald’s lap.

“I take it back,” Oswald says once he catches his breath. “Not pretty, gorgeous.” Ed laughs.

“You’re too kind. That was… that was incredible. Forgive me if I can’t stand just yet.” Oswald smirks, bringing the fingers of his hand to his mouth and licking Ed’s release from them. “Filthy,” Ed says, enthralled by the sight.

“I don’t want to mess up your pretty skirt,” Oswald teases. They fall into a comfortable silence. Ed presses his face into Oswald’s shoulder again, relaxing against him, their chests coming together as they breathe. Oswald relishes the rare moment of silence between them, no words, no defenses. After a while, the burning question won’t be ignored.

“Ed… what was this?” he asks softly. He knows what he _wants_ it to mean.

“I… I saw an opportunity,” Ed doesn’t answer.

“For?” Oswald prompts.

“For… for reconciliation.”

“Do you make up with all your friends like this?” Oswald snarks, his lip curling with distaste at the idea while at the same time he’s already decided that he’ll take it if that’s true.

“No! No, just… Just you,” he admits quietly. “I missed you, Oswald, and I saw an opportunity to progress things. I want to give this a shot. There are things between us… we share a bond that- no, that’s stupid. I missed being with you, being us, and I want to give… an _us_ a chance. Does that make any sense?”

“You want a romantic relationship,” Oswald says.

“Yes,” Ed says, then he huffs. “Didn’t I say that?”

 _Not really,_ Oswald thinks, and says, “How does skipping to sexual intimacy further that?”

“It doesn’t, not really,” Ed says. “I just wanted to.” Oswald can understand wanting things.

“You know I’m not opposed to being in a relationship with you, Ed. Why didn’t you just tell me?”

“Hold on, I did _not_ know that for certain. For all I knew you were biding your time and plotting my demise. The last time we spoke I had just attempted to murder you.”

“You succeeded,” Oswald corrects.

“You… you died?” Ed asks, voice small. The possibility of that had not occurred to him. The knowledge feels heavy. So he had done it after all, killed the Penguin and taken revenge for his lady love. Bravo. He shakes the guilt loose. That was then, this is now. Now he is back where he had wanted to be so long ago, and it had felt very, very good. That’s all that matters.

“Yes, I died. But I’m alright now,” Oswald says, trying to break the sudden tension in Ed’s frame. He can see the flashes in Ed’s eyes, the tension and release of his jaw that tells Oswald he’s conflicted in some way. Ed kisses him lightly, then pulls back and stands. He hisses as Oswald’s cock drags out of him. Ed turns, bending to collect his shirt. Oswald sees his release dripping down Ed’s pale thighs and nearly bites his tongue again. He chokes on whatever else he was about to say.

“You sure about that?” Ed remarks as he hears Oswald coughing, oblivious to his effect on him. He doesn’t even know how attractive he is, Oswald laments, standing and tucking himself back in. He zips up his pants, and if he ignores the wrinkles in his suit it’s like nothing happened.

“We should find your clothes,” he decides, preferably before Ed gives him an aneurism. Ed slips into his shirtsleeves and begins to button them. Oswald feels a bit bereft at the loss, but it’s for the best.

“How did you get here?” Ed asks.

“I was invited,” Oswald says, “and then he forced me into this chair at gunpoint and tied me to it.”

“I was not invited anywhere. I think Jervis was upset with how I was ‘treating’ you. His plan seemed to be demonstrating to you how to handle an errant lover,” Ed says, glancing over at the man in question. He wonders if he’s dead.

“He disgusts me,” Oswald says. “What he wanted me to do, what he thought was proper behavior… I came alone, as requested, hoping for a business deal or a wanted criminal to hand over to James in exchange for a favor.”

“Call Jim; I like being owed favors. It’s like heroin,” Ed says, grinning widely.

“Isn’t it just,” Oswald says. “Do you want a ride back to your place?”

“That would probably be best,” Ed says, sounding like he wants to say something else.

“But not what you want,” Oswald says. He’s starting to figure Ed’s new outlook out.

“But not what I want,” Ed confirms. He sidles up to Oswald, “Can we go back to your place?” he asks, coquettish, arms coming around Oswald’s shoulders.

“Of course,” Oswald says. He kisses him, hardly having to move up onto his toes because Ed is already bending to meet him.

“I’ll call my people when we get there,” Ed says when the kiss ends. “In the meantime, I should really find my pants. This skirt is becoming uncomfortably… _sticky_.”

“Right, of course,” Oswald says, releasing the grip he didn’t even know he had around Ed’s waist. Ed turns and disappears through the only door, coming back a few minutes later fully dressed. Oswald has taken the liberty of tying Jervis for transport. Ed grabs Jervis’s legs, pulling him a short distance and stopping, then again, and again. Oswald laughs. 

“What?” Ed huffs, “I don’t _do_ manual labor. I have people for this.” Oswald joins him. Together they get Jervis outside and hoist him into the trunk of Oswald’s car.

“In a weird way,” Ed says, looking at Oswald with a small smile on his face, “I almost feel as though I should thank him.”

**Author's Note:**

> See, not as bad as you thought it might have been. Do you love me or hate me? Also, I really don't like Jervis. And by that I mean I'd kill him in cold blood. Alice deserved to gut him. Anyways, please comment. <3


End file.
